F-O-R-G-I-V-E

Many of us know that forgiveness is a virtuous and admirable thing. It liberates us from bitterness and anger. Often, we’re rather unswerving when it comes to forgiving those we love, but forgiveness of self is a bit more arduous. If our trusting, loving friend or significant other does something that hurts, we are likely to see the wrongdoing as a single event. We simply remember their goodness and the love that resides in them.

But remembering the goodness and love inside us is another matter because many of us don’t have loving, trusting relationships with ourselves. We are much more critical of what we do/say/think than we are of others. Interestingly enough, we’ll give someone else the benefit of the doubt but won’t allow the same grace for little ol' us.

When we’re dealing with a person we don’t trust or like, most often we can choose to forgive, release the hurt, and simply avoid contact with that person. With ourselves, that’s not an option. We cannot quit or walk away.

Loving and appreciating self is key. The thing to remember is that we’re all doing the best we can at any given moment. If we had known that the action would cause pain to others or ourselves, we most likely wouldn’t have done it.

Instead of replaying the event or events in our mind over and over again, it might be a bit more advantageous to retain the lesson from the event but release everything else.

Recollect and forgive. Remember and pardon. Retain and release.

Now sing it out loud to Aretha Franklin’s song, “Respect.” F-O-R-G-I-V-E