Smolder

Smoke coming from a fire that is burning, but without a flame, is a smolder. A slow burn. Smolder is also known as ‘that look’ a person gives another – that channeling of charm through the eyes to melt another’s heart. Again, slow burn. And then there is that suppressed anger that lies beneath a polite façade. Yet, another slow burn.

The slow burn is rarely seen as something uplifting or to strive for. Even the smoldering gaze is frequently seen as something rather cartoonish and unrealistic. And it makes sense, anything slow is usually not seen in a spectacular light. Especially when it comes to the emotions that make us uncomfortable – anger, fear, sadness, pain, grief. We don’t want to sit in them. We want to rid ourselves of them as quickly as possible.

But there are times when smolder, that slow burn, is exactly what can serve us best. The smolder gives us time to be aware of what we are feeling and why. It helps us to connect a few dots and process what is going on internally. And when we allow time to recognize and receive the emotion, then many times it is our first step to releasing the emotion in a healthy and non-judgmental way.

Sometimes, we really do just need to let things burn out slowly as opposed to extinguishing them immediately.